Mike Sandrolini

Mike Sandrolini

Sunday, June 20, 2010

Which gender likes to play footsie with the dashboard? And why?

It's well-documented that women talk more than men. I've heard most women utter an average of 20,000 words per day, compared to around 7,000 per day used by most men.

I won't dispute these numbers. But I will note that between speaking, writing and thinking -- mind you, I consider thinking as the art of having a conversation with oneself -- I probably hit the 20K mark every day.

We all know there are other notable differences between men and women:
  • Most women love cats. Most men say nice things about their wife's or girlfriend's cat in their presence ... then they'll offer a different perspective when they're out with the boys.
  • Most men hate watching figure skating and/or "Dancing With the Stars," while most women sit glued to the tube when either show comes on. (I'm one of those sensitive men, however, who tunes in every so often to "The Bachelor" just to watch the catfights ... and to see who he dumps at the end of the program.)
  • Putting smiley faces in e-mails is definitely a girl thing. Any man who enjoys putting smiley faces in his e-mails, well, don't be surprised if you see him in boot camp with one of those drill sergeants on Maury Povich.
  • Women like to dance. You'll only see me out cutting the rug if the band plays "Walk Like an Egyptian" by The Bangels.
  • Men will ask for directions only as a last resort. (Me? Guilty as charged.) Women stop and ask for directons the moment they feel they're lost.
  • Most women I know are Cubs fans, and I've figured out why. They're already used to men letting them down time and time again (and they like teddy bears). What's your excuse, fellas?
Men do things that women find either irritating or disgusting, such as not listening, belching at high decible levels, emitting flatulence at inopportune moments (do you really want me to say "passing gas" on a family blog?) ... and leaving the toilet seat up. OK, ladies; you've got us there.

But contrary to popular belief, men are not as clueless as women might think. In fact, I've discovered a trait that's unique to women simply by being observant on the highways and byways. I'd even bet this trait has never been analyzed or discussed on Oprah.

Let's say it's a warm day. A lady happens to be sitting in the passenger seat with either her husband or significant other behind the wheel. She gets comfy, kicks off her shoes and plops her bare feet up on the dashboard.

I have never, ever -- ever -- seen a guy with his bare feet up on the dashboard.

So, if you're a woman who sticks her bare feet up on the dashboard, I'm not picking on you. I'm just curious. In the interest of better understanding between the sexes, please shed some light as to why you do what you do.

It can't be to dry the polish on your toenails. Or to tan your metatarsals through the windshield.

The comments section below is all yours ...

6 comments:

jazzpop88 said...

Mike - You have hit the (toe)nail on the head with this observation, and it's one of the most irritating, disgusting things a woman can do. To me it borders on sacriligios and profane to put bare feet, no matter how pristinely manicured, on a man's clean and Armour-All-ed dash board. Why do they do it? As retribution for all the disgusting things you mention that we men do. I'm convinced of it. Your Cub fan keyboard man from church.

Anonymous said...

Hi Mike-
I'm a woman and have seen others place their feet even outside the automobile's window! I feel the same sense of disgust you men feel. I just think these are women that lack class and good manners! call 'em tom boys If you wish! They have lost their femininity. I will NEVER place my feet on the dashboard or out the car window. Remember guys: a woman must be born with class, as it comes from within!-you can't find it at the store! LOL

Anonymous said...

Oh come on...you guys a way too harsh! It's really not that complicated! I have been known to put my feet on the dash board, especially during a particularly long road trip. After a while your legs start cramping from being confined in the car for such a long period of time.....just think of it as a Lazy-Z-Boy recliner for the car! And, one more thing....I still consider myself a classy lady....so there! :-))

Valerie said...

I'm a woman and I have put my feet on the dashboard on long road trips to stretch the muscles on the back of my legs, but I don't take my socks off, nor do I stick my feet out the window. And, due to my fear of what it might feel like should the airbag deploy while my feet are on the dashboard, I put my feet back where they belong fairly quickly.

Anonymous said...

Mike, most men are doing the driving when it's a couple and it would be hard to get his feet up with the steering wheel in the way! Alas, men too were gym shoes with socks and are not so keen on sandles, again difficult to get them buggers off and up on the dash board. Your friend, A..

Anonymous said...

Hey Mike - I wish I had a photo of it but I actually saw a man with his bare foot on the dashboard of the minivan and - get this - he was driving! He passed my car heading north on I-69 around Ft. Wayne, IN on Saturday, August 14. I passed him a few hours later just over the Michigan state line and he STILL had his foot on the dashboard while he was driving!

- 870 Express

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